A Household Word
Sick Sense

 My kids use this phrase like the password to paradise. I’ve been known to let them stay home from school, thinking that they were ill. That they needed rest. That they were telling the truth. Ha! But I am on to them at last. Here’s the scam.

 7 a.m.  – The child is lying in bed moaning. She is too weak to rise and can barely croak, “I don’t feel good.” She complains that her stomach aches, her head is spinning and her throat is sore. She can’t eat breakfast. She feels like she is going to throw up. It might be strep throat, Hong Kong flu or even the bubonic plague.  

She seemed fine last night. I am suspicious and launch a basic investigation looking for a motive. Is there a math test or a social studies project due? Is the cafeteria serving something particularly gross? Does the child have gym?