It's Time To Apply Son Protection

by Dr. Will Courtenay

So, your son wants to be an invincible super hero. And when he puts on his cape and pretends to fly through the air in pursuit of bad guys, it’s pretty darn cute.

 The problem is, it’s likely that he really believes he’s invincible – and invulnerable.

 If he doesn’t believe it now, chances are he will. Research of teenagers shows that boys are more likely than girls to think they’re invulnerable to a variety of risks

 Boys are not alone in holding this belief. Their parents believe it too – and reinforce it. “Boys,” we say, “are tough!” But the truth is, boys are vulnerable. 

Each day, 18 boys under age 15 die in the United States – 3 times the number of girls who do. Nearly all of these deaths are violent, and the result of injury, suicide and homicide. Boys are also 1½ times more likely than girls to get injured

 Despite these risks, parents actually misperceive boys – even as babies – as being less vulnerable than girls. These misperceptions are based on gender stereotypes, which boys are expected to conform to even more so than girls. In fact, boys are frequently punished when they violate the rules of boyhood.

So, conform they do. The problem is, conforming to the rules of boyhood increases boys’ risks. That’s because the tools we give boys in America to become men are, for the most part, unhealthy attitudes and behaviors.

Pretending to be invulnerable is just one page out of what I call “The Playbook for Manhood” – which boys are taught from parents, teachers, coaches and society in general. Parents, for example, are more likely to encourage their sons than their daughters in risky activities and are much less concerned about the safety of their sons, despite boys’ greater risk. Even peers adhere to the Playbook, and are tougher on boys than girls while enforcing unhealthy, stereotypical boy behavior.

Then there’s media, which codifies the Playbook and teaches boys all kinds of unhealthy behaviors – through commercials, movies, magazines, television, and video games. Boys are more likely than girls to be portrayed engaging in all kinds of risky and unhealthy behaviors, and to be marketed junk foods, tobacco and alcohol.