How to Make for Smoother Transitions Throughout the Day

Getting Kids from Point A to Point B


By Janice Wells


Hearing that it's time to go to the park, your child yelps with joy and races off to snag a pair of sneakers. Ten minutes later he is still there, shoeless, changed into pirate's gear and building a block castle. What happened?


Even when children want to participate in an upcoming event, moving from one activity or location to the next can sometimes prove a real challenge - no matter the age.


For example, a short attention span and an intense interest in her surroundings can cause a very young child to lose focus when making the transition from one situation to another, notes Rex Forehand, Ph.D., co-author of  Parenting the Strong-Willed Child. Since preschoolers and toddlers generally understand "now" but not units of time in the future, such as "15 minutes from now," they can appear to resist getting ready for future activities.


Even school-age children can also have trouble meeting the hurry-up demands of a grown-up's world.


"Adults move at a pace that isn't always in synch with the rhythm of understanding that children use to focus in the here-and-now," says Mimi Doe, author of Busy But Balanced: Practical and Inspirational Ways to Create a Calmer, Closer Family. "As a result, sometimes we disengage kids from their natural pace and expect them to meet ours."


For example, a child might be in the midst of intently studying a spider's web and attempting to draw what she sees right when you need to go somewhere. She naturally becomes less than enthusiastic when interrupted with statements such as, "Quick, in the car, we need to pick up your sister from soccer practice!" or "Hurry up, don't dawdle, it's time to go to school!" But transition troubles can improve with parental help.


What Parents Can Do


As a first step, assess the situation at hand. Then, depending on your child's reaction, mix and match the following tips to help your child successfully reach any point in a "personal best" time:



  • Explain the big picture. In the morning, give kids an idea of what the rest of the day will be like, advises Doe. You can say, "Tina, you will have school today, then lunch with me, shopping in the early afternoon and then the rest of the afternoon to do what you'd like."
     

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