How Divorced Parents Stay Connected with Their Kids

By Jim McGaw

But what if you’re divorced and have no – or only partial – custody of your children? And what if you’re in conflict with your ex-spouse? For these parents, those few minutes of small talk while taxiing kids around town are extra precious. How do moms or dads who may only have their children a few hours each week or month connect with their kids in such a limited amount of time?

The biggest trap many noncustodial or nonresidential parents fall into is the “Disneyland parent” syndrome, says psychologist Anthony E. Wolf, author of Why Did You Have to Get a Divorce? And When Can I Get a Hamster? “One of the misconceptions is that it’s really important to schedule a lot of fun stuff,” says Wolf. “These parents need to be aware that it may be more meaningful to spend two hours driving around on a Saturday morning than to spend the same two days at ‘Fun World.’ Overscheduling can take away from the actual connection between the kids and the parent.”