Getting Your Child Through Doctors Appointments

By Christina Elston

Nancy Mansfield’s 80-year-old mother had her tonsils taken out decades ago, but remembers it like it was yesterday. “Her mother told her that they were going to the circus, and that she was going to be in it,” Mansfield says. At the hospital, she happily changed into a hospital gown (her “costume”).

“Then they strapped her down to a gurney and her mother said, ‘Bye!’”

This kind of trauma is what Mansfield, executive director of the Institute for Families at Childrens Hospital Los Angeles, now works to prevent by advocating for children and educating their doctors. The institute provides counseling and support to families with a child suffering from serious illness, but Mansfield’s advice applies to any parent whose child needs a medical procedure – or even just a checkup.

“If you’re honest about everything from the get-go, it will go the best,” she says.
Here are some strategies for helping your child through a tough doctor’s visit or medical procedure:

Role Play and Empower

A great way to prepare your child for doctor visits is through play. Your child gets to be the doctor. You (or one of their stuffed animals or dolls voiced by you) are the patient. And as the patient, you should bring up any concerns that you think your child might have. “Do I need any medicine today, doctor? Will I be getting a shot?” Keep it fun and make it a natural, but occasional, part of your play.

By the time your child is 5, you can empower him by teaching him to speak up for himself through role play. “Teach [him] to say, ‘Doctor, talk to me. Could you explain that to me?’” Mansfield says.

Talk About Hurts

If your child has a procedure coming up, talk with the nurse beforehand and find out what’s going to happen. That will help you be less anxious, and give you a chance to prepare your child. If the visit will involve a finger stick or a shot, talk with your child about how it will hurt. “I say it’s like a really big pinch,” Mansfield says, “or use examples of other things they’ve experienced that hurt for a second and then don’t hurt any more.”