Family Rules: There Is a Method to Your Madness!

By Mary LoVerde


Technical as the concept may sound, family policies can be effective ways to calm chaos, manage expectations and behavior, and instill important values.


We already know how to use policies. We have them at work, at church or temple, and in the organizations to which we belong. We accept retailers' return policies, insurance policies and IRS rules. Webster's defines policy as "wisdom in the management of affairs." And, thus, we can wisely manage our family life by using guidelines that reflect what is most important to us.


I've surveyed thousands over parents of the years, asking them what worked best in their families. Here are some of their creative family policies:


No one is allowed to say "shut up."



"This demonstrates that our family believes we must show respect for each other. Interestingly, this one simple policy has helped set a higher standard in general, and we've become much more polite to one another."


Thursday is Mom's night out.



"This models that everyone, even moms, need time to be alone, enjoy friends, try new things and renew themselves. When my children grow up I want them to know how to take care of themselves, so they need to see me taking care of myself."


Schoolwork comes before electronics.



"A policy like this teaches my children how to set priorities, follow through with assignments and efficiently organize tasks, including having fun with the techie toys they love so much."


We always fill up the gas tank when it's 1/4 full to avoid a panic when I am running late.



"My kids love that Daddy drives them to school. So I make sure our short time together is spent happily, not racing to the gas station. I believe this teaches my children to anticipate the stresses in life and how to build in some strategies that will help life go smoother."


I do not sign permission slips in the morning.



"We go over any field trip requirements the night before. This policy acknowledges that we all have our quirks. If you know you're not a morning person, establish policies that honor that fact."


The car does not move until everyone is buckled up.



Articles Tools

Top