Everyday Etiquette for Parents and Teachers

By Diane Gottsman

1. When you drop off your child at his classroom, give him a hug and a kiss, tell him you will see him after school and leave! A crying child will stop crying about 14 seconds after mom leaves the room. It is difficult for a teacher to take control with mom attached to her shoulder. Multiply that by 20 moms and you've got the picture. That also includes having a powwow with other moms outside the classroom door.

• Teacher's response: "All right, Mom and Dad, class is about to begin. Please help your child by getting on with your day. Good-bye."

2. Drop off time is not the time for an impromptu conference. If there is a question or concern, schedule a time when you can visit the teacher or call and request a meeting.

• Teacher's advice: Don't feel compelled to engage in a mini conference every time you see the teacher. Simply say, "Good morning."

3. Don't arrive at the classroom early and expect to drop off your child. This is the time that teachers use to prepare and deal with last minute details for the upcoming day.

• Teacher's advice: "Good morning, Mrs. Smith. Good morning, Jimmy. Please go to morning care and I will see you very soon."

4. Be informed. Check your child's book bag daily and make sure to keep up with homework assignments, library books, special events, extracurricular activities and picture day.

5. Bite your tongue. Conversations between you and your child's teacher should be confidential. If you are unhappy with the teacher, go through the appropriate channels. Do not get other parents involved.

• Teacher's advice: "I have heard from other parents that you have a concern. I'd very much like to resolve the conflict. In the future, would you please come directly to me?"

6. Don't make comments about the teacher in front of your child. Modeling respect starts at home and it does not bode well for a child to hear their mom or dad discrediting the teacher.

• Teacher's advice: Be mindful of the power you wield. Never, under any circumstances, berate, belittle or name call. It can make a lasting impression on the student.