10 Talents of Parenting

Every person alive has experienced some form of loss. We may have lost a parent or a sibling, or lost our sense of safety because of being abused or neglected as a child. We may not have lost anyone to death, but instead lost their love and affection because of illness, depression, addiction, anger or stress. These old losses can have a big impact on our ability to be effective parents.

Self-Acceptance How to End the Blame Game

Letting go of self-criticism doesn’t mean that the quality of our parenting doesn’t matter. But listening to that same old radio station, the one that keeps playing that same lousy song, doesn’t help us or our children. So change the station! Find one that celebrates your successes and accomplishments, or that treats you with tender sympathy – not harsh put-downs – when you mess up.

Connection

Focusing on relationship to ease power struggles with your child

Reaching Out Reaching Out for Support

Rarely does a parent who gets enough support - either practical or emotional support for the joys and despair of parenthood. How have you managed to get support? Who listens and pays attention to you - after you spend all day paying attention to your kids? Do you know how to ask for the support you need?

Trust Turning Worry into Trust

Perhaps the opposite of worry is trust - trust in development, trust in your parenting, trust in the power of friendship, and trust in children's resilience.

Conclusion: Putting the 10 Talents in Perspective

The parents who logged on to the 10 Talents forum at Parenthood.com wrote about a variety of ways that they nurture their parenting abilities. Many wrote about playfulness, saying that they tried to remember to make it a part of every day.
 


Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D., is a psychologist who specializes in children's play and play therapy, and is the author of several books, including the award-winning Playful Parenting(Ballantine Books, 2001).